Goodbye
by Bohemian Storm
Summary: A different take on how Angel may have reacted after Conner was taken from him. Please r


Good-bye  
  
Wesley lay on the grass, staring at the night sky, wondering which star would be the one to lead him away when the time finally came. His breath came out slow and ragged, but it was enough to sustain him, if only for a short time. He had to live until they found him. He had to explain what happened, he couldn't let them believe what they did.  
  
His mind whirled, despite the lack of oxygen it was receiving. He thought of a million things to say, but none made sense. There was a sense of dull pain somewhere in the back of his mind, but he ignored it as best he could. He focused on surviving.   
  
He lay on his back staring upward, his glasses slightly bent on his face. His green eyes were wide, searching, sometimes empty. One hand clutched his throat like it was the only thing keeping him alive. Blood seeped between his fingers, ran down his neck and pooled on the grass beneath him. The other hand was stretched outward, palm up toward the sky, grasping occasionally at the air. He found nothing to hold onto, no one to comfort him in his final moments.  
  
Even as he lay dying, Wesley cursed himself. Why had he been so stupid? Taking Conner away hadn't solved anything and now the baby was in Holtz's hands and Wesley feared the worst. If Angel didn't kill him, Holtz would and then it would be over. All he had worked for, trying to keep the baby safe, it would be destroyed.  
  
A pained moan escaped his mouth, slowing working its way through his torn vocal chords and into the air around him. It hurt suddenly, too much for him to bear and all he wanted in the world was to let go. His hand was growing sticky around his throat, but Wesley didn't know if the blood had stopped flowing because he was putting pressure on the wound or because there was no more blood left to flow. He groaned again, tears squeezing from his eyes and sliding down his cheeks. They fell on the grass, mingled with the blood and disappeared into the red substance.   
  
He knew it was the end. He would never be able to tell Angel how sorry he was, he would never be able to explain that he just wanted to keep Conner alive.  
  
One last time, Wesley's empty hand grasped at the night air and closed upon another hand.  
  
He gasped, then coughed harshly, blood spraying from his mouth. Through the haze that was covering his eyes, he could see Angel leaning over him. Wesley cringed, knowing how angry he would be. He tried to tell him what happened, tried to put into words the sorrow he felt, but nothing would come out of his throat. Angel leaned further over and Wesley opened his eyes wide, trying to show him the truth there. He was afraid to look at Angel's face, afraid of the anger and betrayal he would see there, but he looked, knowing he deserved whatever Angel felt.  
  
The vampire had tears streaming down his face.  
  
"Oh God Wesley," he moaned, squeezing his hand. "I'm so sorry."  
  
Wesley shook his head and tried to speak once more. "No . . . my fault."  
  
"Nothing is your fault." Angel said, placing a finger over Wesley's mouth. "Nothing. Fred found your papers and called me. She told me what you found."  
  
"The father will . . . kill the son." Wesley said.  
  
Angel nodded. "Were you going to hide him? Keep him safe? Tell me you were. Lorne thinks you were delivering him to Holtz, but finding you here . . . I can't believe that."  
  
Wesley's eyes widened. "I went to him," he coughed and tried desperately to catch his breath, "tried to keep him away. Told him I'd keep Conner safe from . . . you." A sob hitched in his throat and he coughed blood again. "He took him." His eyes met Angel's, huge, imploring and dismal. "He's okay?"  
  
Angel looked away, refusing to meet the enormous green eyes, yet he couldn't hide the truth from Wesley.  
  
"Oh God," he turned onto his side and vomited on the lawn. "Oh God Angel, Oh God."  
  
"Wesley, shhh." Angel turned him back, staring at him sadly. He wiped the corner of Wesley's mouth, pretending he didn't see the blood there. "There's nothing you could have done. You tried so hard and you fought so bravely, that's all I could ever ask for. You . . . you gave your life to save my son."  
  
"All for nothing . . ." Wesley trailed off, "took him and killed him."  
  
"We don't know that." Angel told him. "He took Conner into another dimension, somewhere I couldn't go and now . . . I'll get him back Wesley, I swear to you I'll get him back. I won't let this go. I'll never let it go."  
  
"Why?"  
  
Angel looked confused. "Why what?"  
  
"Kill your son . . . why did you want to eat him?"  
  
"Wolfram and Hart." Angel growled. "For some reason, Lilah wants him too. She put Conner's blood into my pig's blood." His face softened. "I never would have . . . you know that right?"  
  
Wesley's eyes drooped. "Yes. I know." His breathing slowed and turned toward Angel. "Can't speak much,"  
  
"I know," Angel cut him off, "don't push yourself."  
  
"Can't speak much," Wesley repeated, "but must say I'm sorry. So sorry I couldn't save him Angel." He spoke a full sentence, the words searing his throat. "Sorry I couldn't keep him safe."  
  
"You tried Wesley." Angel told him, tears falling more freely now.  
  
"Love you." Wesley said, reaching up and grasping Angel's other hand. "Gunn and Fred and Cordelia . . . love them too."  
  
"We love you Wes. I couldn't have asked for a better brother." Angel reached down and pulled his friend into a hug, listening as he drew his last breath. Sobs racked his body as he clung to Wesley, trying to will him back to life.   
  
His blood was still warm against Angel's shoulder when the vampire picked him up and carried him to his car. He would take him home and they would find a place to bury him together. They would say their first goodbye to a member of their family. And his promise would remain. He would never let Wesley's death go without a reason. Angel would save Conner, for Wesley as much as for himself.  
  
  
End 


End file.
